Yesterday I did not get any drinks to dissolve all my stress and sorrow. Why? Firstly, dont want to waste MY money. Secondly, lazy. Last, smoking three cigarettes in 10 minutes can dissolve almost all my sorrow.

Anyways, got into a fight with the Iblis again. You know, its become a habit to fight and argue frequently. Hahakz.. It all started when he refused to give me the damn password to his "old" email. I felt so angry, disappointed and frustrated because he refused to give me the password. It maybe unreasonable but I have the right to know, right? Obviously anger took over me and I smsed him nonsense to let him know how I feel. Instead of consoling me, he added fuel to the forest fire. I ignored all his sms and calls.

When I reached home, he was already waiting for me at the doorstep. I went into my room to get my clothes to change. He stopped me and pushed and pulled me quite forcefully. Asked me questions on the nonsense sms I sent earlier. Then I clearly told him what I have been expecting from him. Which is faithfulness, open and honesty. The fight ended with me "mengalah" or letting him win the fight.

But WAIT! There's more...

Later that night, I checked out his handphone just to see what pictures of me he has in his handphone. After checking out my pictures, I took a look at his sent items and read each sms that was sent earlier that day. Saw a message that disturbed me but I thought it had nothing to do with me. Scroll down to look some more and saw something that pierced into my breast. Ooops. I meant chest. Hehee..
It was not a message sent to a girl but to a guy. No, that Iblis is not gay! It was a message sent to his childhood friend. It said,"Bro, do u have any chicks that u can recommend me? Me n my girl got conflict." WOW! That message put alot of ideas in my mind. Bad ones!

Confronted him. He said after I sent all those nonsensical smses, he had to think of a back-up plan. Then I started ignoring him and had this ignorant look on my face. He kept pestering me and told me that it was nothing, he did not get any girl contacts, he asked me if I was angry. I still ignored him. I didnt want to say anything because my sis and her husband was around. I changed his wallpaper from my picture to another that did not have me in it. He asked me why I had to change the wallpaper. I told him, whats the use of putting my picture as your wallpaper when you have the desire to contact other girls. He tried to explain and then he walked off and went into my room.

I got up and went into my room to clear and resolve the matter. I asked him, "This meant that you were getting ready for a break up? So everytime we fight, you contact other girls? This time you had no girl contacts so you ask from your friend, so that you have another girl to entertain? You really want to contact other girls? You are bored of me right? Bored of this relationship right?"
He just kept shaking his head and said no. My hands were already trembling. I kept quiet. Tears was in my eyes. He has disappointed me so many times and after giving me hope for the future, he disappoints me again. I stared away to clear the tears from my eyes then I saw him covering his face with my pillow. I took the pillow away and saw him rubbing his eyes. Went nearer to his face and touched his face. It was wet with his tears. His face was pretty wet which meant he was already crying before I came into the room. The lights were off that is why I didnt know that he was crying from the moment I stepped into the room.

Knowing that he cried made me soften up. I hugged him and gave him a kiss on his cheek. I asked why he was crying. He just shook his head. Egoist! By not letting your ego get the better of you, are you less of a man?

That reminded me of a story. I was listening to Class 95, Morning Express. F.D. and Glenn Ong was talking about relationship advices. There was one advice about apologise, make up and hope. It goes something like this; Guys if you want to resolve a fight, firstly apologise to your lover for disappointing her. Secondly, give her a hug and kiss. Lastly, give her hope for a better future. In this way, you have already healed the past, build a bridge to the present and give hope for the future.

Isnt that true ladies out there? That would really make the situation better.

Guys! Dont let your ego get the better of you! Say sorry as frequently as you can to your loved one. Dont let your lover say sorry for no reason just to solve the issue. Dont let the lady be the man of the relationship because you're the one who is supposed to be the man.

Hopefully, that Iblis improves his attitude and behaviour. Hopefully, he becomes the man of the relationship instead of me. Hopefully, he will try his best to make this relationship last. To cut it short, I hope that this relationship gets better, so I will suffer less.

Got to go. Need to get ready for my 1st tuition assignment with a new tuitee for this year. I pray that the girl or boy is easy to teach and not stubborn. I hope that time pass so fast that without knowing, its time for me to go home. Kekekeke...

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